One of the best shows on tv right now in case you’ve missed it. I was scanning through our Tivo the other day and apparently the only thing I watch anymore is Mythbusters, Golf Central. Survivorman, and Sniper School – proof positive that I’m turning into my father faster than expected. However, I think I’ve come up with a good episode for Mythbusters.
Myth: Can an iPod that hits a treadmill running at 8.5 mph suddenly be turned into a mini-rocket and hit someone 15 feet behind you on a stair master?
You don’t have to wait around for the answer to this one – it’s an unfortunate yes.
For the last year I’ve been working out at UT during my lunch hour. A good way to stay in shape, but a bad place for someone like me who refuses to admit he’s a day over 18.
I was on a treadmill at lunch and doing fine cruising along at a steady 5-6 mph. I’m not a fast runner, and don’t plan on being one. The problem is there was this guy to my right clipping by at 7mph and then this female phenom to my left hitting a steady 9 mph. I’m sure it had nothing to do with the fact that she was a little younger than me, and by a little younger I mean that she was probably 6 years old when the GnR “Appetite for Destruction” I was listening to on my iPod came out. No, it can’t be that – she was probably there at UT on some World Class Sprinting scholarship.
I was left with no choice – I had to increase the speed. I get up somewhere between 8.5-9.0 mph and I’m doing fine. Other than the fact that I can’t see and my left leg is numb. Somewhere around this time my hand hits the earphone cord and rips the iPod off the front of the treadmill down to the belt where it is quickly propelled behind me. I snap my head around just in time to see it hit the stairmaster behind me. Thankfully the front of the stairmaster took the brunt of the blow and it didn’t come in contact with the girl on the machine. To set the scene, there are probably 20 treadmills across the front row and then an additional 20 elliptical and other cardio machines in the row behind, and they were almost all full. I had quite a crowd.
I thought at this point there were only two options, fake a stroke and bow out gracefully, or get back on. Clearly, if you can’t handle the treadmill at 8.5 mph the only thing left to do in my mind is to get back on and increase the speed. So, I did. I made it a little while longer and then left the scene quietly.
I know there’s a lesson in here somewhere about aging or humility or something. But I think there’s an even more important one, for me. Clearly, I need to get one of those iPod nanos – those things are so much lighter that when this happens again, it will greatly reduce my liability if it hits someone.