DTPA

For all you non legal types out there – that stands for Deceptive Trade Practices Act.  While I’ve been on both sides of a DTPA case, I never believed in them until now.

Build and Play in One Day – Deception at it’s worst.  I’ve never seen such gross negligence as this.  Build in one day?  Sure, if your last weekend project was an eight bedroom house, or perhaps a large condo in downtown Manhattan.  No problem.

Let me back up a bit.  The girls, including ringleader Al, had been hitting me up for a swing set.  I rejected all the options; too flimsy, too cheap, it’s all balsa wood, etc.  This kept me alive for some time, but when it came down to it, I had to make a move.

I found a kit that had instructions and the actual swing seats and chains.  But you had to supply the lumber yourself.  Now we’re talking.  I wanted 4×8’s and lots of ‘em.  Nothing mickey mouse here.

Problem is, when it comes to something like this, my confidence generally outweighs my ability by a large margin.

Proper carpenter gear as always.  More on that later.

Progress…at last.  I worked until close to midnight on this behemoth.  And thanks to the flip flop sportin carpenter.  I had enough splinters, wood shavings and blisters to last a lifetime.  Not to mention, I woke up about every 45 minutes screaming.  I told Al not to worry, the back spasms only lasted about 15 minutes and to go back to bed.  She was less than sympathetic.

I knew it was bad when I got out of bed the next morning and took half a dozen Alleve.  I woke up shortlty thereafter and realized that I was only dreaming.  I needed at least a dozen Alleve, but I was so #$#%! sore there was no way I could have made it out of bed to get to the medicine cabinet.

The final result…

The girls loved it.  Not only can they both swing from it, but I could hang an engine block from a 48 ‘Buick from this thing.  Not that I would necessarily, but like my dad always said, “It’s nice to have options.”

3 thoughts on “DTPA”

  1. With the purchase of our new pad, came the option to buy their playscape that is already assembled and installed. However, Aaron had to research and really weigh all options, INCLUDING buying a “build in a day” deal from Home Depot and just “do it myself after we move in.” Thank goodness he saw the light and realized that w/a new baby on the way and a move to a new house just a few weeks prior to the due date, it was just easier to buy the thing that is currently parked in the backyard in fine working order.

    I just read aloud to him this post, and he wanted me to let you know that Shiner Bock is a must in a good carpenter’s arsenal.

    Good job, Mark! Your girls look thrilled w/the finished product.

  2. Love to have options. If you ever pull that engine block, let me know. I’ll be down with Dad and some cold shiner. I believe between the two of us you will get the correct amount of supervision. You never really got the joy of helping Dad pull an engine.

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